Off the Rails of a Swayze Train

Can somebody please tell me what kind of a world we live in where Laura Dern is as healthy as a horse, but Patrick Swayze has to waste away into nothingness? I don’t have enough on my plate with this recession and T.I. going to prison?

Now I have to deal with a tabloid headline in the grocery checkout line: “I’m not dying.

So I looked at the picture inside the magazine. Not dying? There was more of him lifting the penny in Ghost than there is of him now.


And of course, my mind went to that dark place again… that place where God takes Swayze before me. And I started thinking, if Patrick Swayze was gone tomorrow, would my list be ready?

So, without further ado, here’s my top three Swayze Moments:


1) Dirty Dancing as Johnny Castle

The Scene: The Last Number of the Season at Kellerman’s.

corner1Trips to Europe, that’s what the kids want. You have to realize what’s at stake here. Johnny has been fired. He’s officially trespassing at this point. It doesn’t matter; nobody’s going to stop him. Not Jerry Orbach, not Robbie the slimeball, and not even Newman who was definitely on the stage. Johnny rescues Baby from the corner, restores his reputation with Dr. Houseman, interrupts the Pechanga, and delivers the most chilling line in movie history: “I’m gonna do my kind of dancin’ with a great partner.”

Cue The Time of My Life, as a performance for the ages unfolds. For my money, it’ll never get better than when they nail the lift at the end.


2) She’s Like the Wind as Swayze
The Whole Video

Swayze’s agent sold it like this: Here’s the plan: this amazing song you sang, we’re going to have you sit on a stool and dramatically sing to someone just off-camera. Then, we’ll take scenes from the movie, turn them black and white, and add a ripple effect on it. Then, you just go home and wait for the call from the Grammys.


3) Ghost as Sam Wheat
The Scene: The One Where He Makes This Face:

ghost-1Apparently it was supposed to be Bruce Willis in the role of Sam. But Swayze signs on, he’s the one who lobbies for Whoopi, and I end up dropping the word “ditto” on my eighth grade girlfriend who broke up with me the same night (second one from the right. What’s up, Sidney? Thanks for dumping me at Megan’s party. Remember when I said I wouldn’t tell anyone that your father was an alcoholic? Whoops.).


mulletswayzeSome reports say he’s on his death bed now. Others declare we have at least two more years with him. It’s hard to say. But I know that between giref and nothing, I’ll take grief. And so I continue to let myself be vulnerable, hoping and wishing for one last, great Swayze moment.


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